foodie nyc

2006 Best and Worst Food Shows

I’ve spent a lot of time analyzing the current state of food TV and not much has changed since my  2005 Best and Worst list. Unfortunately, this is due to the complete mismanagement at the Food Network, which has hit record lows in programming quality. The Food Network continues to suck, PBS is still humming along but needs a few new shows and Bravo has thankfully created one of the best food shows in recent memory. Last year’s list was by far my most popular post in the history of this tiny site, so I hope this creates a new forum for those of you who like to commiserate over such dorkiness.

Thanks But No Thanks

Semi Homemade with Sandra Lee

I’ll go out on a limb here and say that this is worst food show ever created and produced for air. Yes, pervs, I understand that she has large boobs and they are intriguing in the semi-homemade sense, but I’m not going to go into boob analysis on this site. But please, people. There’s no hotness here. And since her food makes me want to puke, 2005 led me to dedicate hours of my life devoted toward expressing my utter distaste for everything Sandra Lee. What I find more interesting is how this crap is still on the air. Who watches this show and likes it? Seriously. I need to know. I need to find you, Sandra Lee lovers, and understand what makes you tick. I will devote precious FoodieNYC real estate to let you wax on about your semi homemade fantasies like pre-packaged mashed potatoes and the joys of creating NASCAR themed tablescapes. Since Food Network is completely out of touch with its viewers and all current food trends, I predict 2007 will lead to a 10 year Semi Homemade contract extension.

Unwrapped

I don’t even consider this a show. It’s more like an infomercial. I’d rather watch that dude Chef Tony sell me a Pasta Express. The few times I have attempted to watch this show has led me to lose multiple IQ points. In addition, I have woken from my Unwrapped brain coma drooling, wearing goggles and covered in whipped cream like the kids in Mark Summers last successful show, Double Dare. Unwrapped is a great show because not only can I learn about the process of making Dum Dum lollipops for exciting party conversation, but my brain will be guaranteed to turn into one as well.

Paula's Party

Food Network is trying to turn Paula Deen into the next Emeril. I bet you she scores well in focus groups with people who still think there were weapons of mass destruction in Iraq. You don’t believe me? I predict more of the mass commercialization of The Butter Queen in 2007. I can see it now.  Paula Deen Crisco sponsorships, Paula Deen Butter Injections products available at Walmart, the Paula Deen Transfat line.  This will then lead to a rise in the depression rate in North East and West Coast regions of the U.S., followed by increased cholesterol levels for the rest of the country. Good times ahead, Y’ALL!!! Now go get some chugging butter ready for the Paul Deen marathon coming soon to prime time!

The Next Food Network "Star"

How ironic. You compete on a reality show that is second rate to Top Chef. You are then anointed a second rate food competition winner. You win the chance to become the Food Network Star, which gives you the chance to embarrass yourself in front of your family by creating a program that is book ended by Semi Homemade with Sandra Lee and The Secret Life Of. You get to be judged by Sandra Lee herself during the competition, who gives you points on food preparation because she’s clearly aced that aspect of her life. I would try out for this show and intentionally attempt to lose.

Eh.

Everyday Italian

Look. I do not rip Giada on this site. Last year, I refused to put her into the worst category due to her breakthrough cleavage demonstrations and her cutting edge cleavage techniques. But listen people. I have been studying Everyday Italian and there is a marked reduction in cleav love recently. This could be a career killer for Giada, so I will again make my cleav styling skills available to her as needed. By the way, I guarantee her Giada goes on Tour show will die a cruel, unremarkable, boring death like Food Nation, Alton Hits the Road, and Molto Runs Around the Midwest. I’m not sure why, but it may be because we’ve all seen this concept and it SUCKS!

Ace of Cakes

I would never intentionally make time in my life to watch Ace of Cakes, but it is a pretty decent show. Mr. Ace is pretty creative and his business seems to hinge on a semi-stoned dude holding onto a flamingo cake in the back seat of a shady van. I like the rando characters who work there. If this show were on Bravo, the character development would be a lot edgier and would probably be a lot funnier. Hey Ace, go pimp yourself to a cable channel that cares, dude.

Barefoot Contessa

Her cooking is honest and seems pretty tasty. But the fake scenarios continue to nauseate and will seemingly become less tolerable as time goes on. Barefoot needs to put some shit kicking shoes on and get a new show concept before her lameness starts to overwhelm her cooking.

Best of a Bad Lot

Top Chef

Top Chef is the best food show on TV right now, hands down. Wanna know why? Food geeks, general food lovers and even apathetic food people all love it. Even better, I think it’s just hitting its stride right now. The characters are rich without being annoyingly overdeveloped, the challenges are honest and interesting, the production values are high, the host is smoking hot, Colicchio does a nice job and guest cheffy judges add spice to each show. I would say this is the best food show on TV right now and the best since Iron Chef proper launched in the U.S. in the late 90’s. Don’t believe me? Try and think of one. Bourdain? I could listen to those arguments. Iron Chef America? I ‘d say a notch below.

Throwdown with Bobby Flay

I suspect some of you will torch me for this, but I like Bobby Flay’s Throwdown. Again, I do not know when it airs and would never think about dropping plans to see it, but I like the concept and I enjoy seeing some of the characters he competes against do their thing,. The military guy who grills steak? Loved his story. The crazy woman who was obsessed with creating the best brunch in the South? She freaked me out but in a good way. This show is solely reliant on the guest talent, but when it’s right, the show is pretty entertaining.

Iron Chef America

I continue to like (not love) this show. I have nothing more to add to my previous Iron Chef American analysis, volume I and II, other than reiterating that 1) Kevin Brauche needs to get canned and 2) if Morimoto does not compete, we should get another Iron Chef on there to break up the continuous Batali/Flay battles.

Lydia

A+ continues. Apparently she has a new show in development, which I have heard takes her out of the kitchen. Can anyone confirm this? Be scared, people.

In Conclusion

I have been watching food tv shows for about 10 years now, and other than 2005, this was one of the worst food TV years I can ever remember.  2007 looks relatively unpromising at this point, but you never know. Cross your fingers.

2006 Best and Worst NYC Restaurant Trends

I'm going to be doing a series of posts over the next few weeks featuring my Best and Worst lists of the year, covering a range of food related topics.  Sure, this is a cliched idea but I hope you find the content fresh.  I have a few fun topics I plan to cover, but for now, I'll focus on highlighting key NYC restaurant related trends that I've personally found interesting over the past year or so. 

The Best Stuff

Bigger Isn’t Better

With the launch of Del Posto, Morimoto and Buddahkan, I began to worry that the American perception of ‘bigger is better’ would begin to build momentum for new and future restaurants in the city. Thankfully, this trend seems to be short lived.  I understand that space is luxury, but I favor intimacy and the personality that comes out in the smaller to medium sized restaurants we have. To me, a restaurant is a brand. It’s hard to establish a connection with your consumers if you feel like just another person in a sea of tables.

The Rise of Spain

Tapas have given reason for people to enter the country’s cuisine, but only on a broad level. In the past year, authentic Spanish tapas restaurants like Tia Pol continue to expose people to traditional renditions of Spanish cuisine. Hopefully, this trend will continue to grow even further. I personally rank Spain as one of the best cuisines and wine countries in the world and there are many Spanish regions and traditional cuisines yet to be explored.

Welcome Back, 11 Madison Park

11 Madison had been such an underachieving restaurant to me, almost from its inception. I found it such a shame – excellent space, excellent location, excellent service, great wine list. But the food had always been very uninspired to me. Enter Chef Daniel Humm from the West Coast, who in my opinion has quickly become one of the top 5 chefs in the city who are actually in the kitchen most nights of the week. Humm’s cuisine is creative, approachable, complex yet simple. These contradictions make dining fun at 11 Madison again.

BLT Empire Expansion

I think BLT Fish, Prime, Steak and Burger are all winners and while I’m hoping the formula doesn’t stretch itself to thin, the BLT franchise is making a welcomed impact on the cuisine of the city.

Bloggers as Restaurant Consumer Advocates

While I can’t bring myself to take pictures in the dining room, I appreciate those who do. The detailed pictures and accounts of restaurant menus and experiences are always previewed on a variety of sites like eGullet, Restaurant Girl, Augieland and Amateur Gourmet. While I recognize they are only one person’s opinion, I enjoy reading numerous entries about the same restaurant on sites across the web to note trends or themes that help form my decisions about where I want to eat next.

Bringing the Farmer to the Table

We’ve gone from highlighting the source of meats, fish and vegetables on the menu to entire restaurants based on the concept of featuring local farmed ingredients (Cookshop, Blue Hill Stones Barns). Restaurants like Applewood are bringing in farmers to meet the consumer, another great step in the right direction. Now when will the next step come to life - like restaurants that only feature sustainable foods? This can be pretty exciting for all of us.

The Worst Stuff

Parity

There is a clear formula for success right now in terms of opening a new restaurant. As we all know, the trick lies in execution, of course. But the formula is growing tired for me and has led to the opening of an explosion of ‘me-too’ restaurants in 2006. The formula bores the living shit out of me. Sexy interior, trendy bar scene, dim lights, electronic generic tracks, large menus with different price points (something for everyone), pretty good food that’s generally forgettable a week later. A PR machine that starts with constant Eater buzzing, receives a 1 star review from Bruni and is a non-factor a year later. I tend to monitor but stay away from the fray. Do I really care about The Waverly Inn’s secret phone number, all in an effort for a pot pie I can get anywhere else? Does it really deserve constant buzzing? These are ‘me-too’ restaurants that will attract lots of buzz and will fade into oblivion. You can detect passion and originality in the cooking, menu and personality in the ownership or staff of a truly great restaurant. Sure, they need all of the other factors in the formula to thrive as well, but these principles are what make them special. In fact, many of my favorites tend to stray from the formula in small, quirky and sometimes dramatic ways.

The Everything Menu

The menus continue to expand. Five little bites to start the meal. The raw bar. Sushi. Ten small plates. Five salads. Ten appetizers. Ten entrees. Five sides. I can’t wait until this trend reverses itself and we get back to the small, focused menus that restaurants know with certainly they can executed to their utmost potential. I may be on my own on this one, but I appreciate focus and consistency vs. range.

Mexican

Zero progress on one of the most misunderstood and untapped cuisines in NYC.

Dining as Status

Restaurant gossip sites have tapped into our need to know the latest and greatest about the NYC dining scene. But in my opinion, they’ve gone way too far. NYC is always going to be about the last and greatest, but the daily posts hyping the secret phone number of Waverly Inn, the minute by minute liquor license status of E.U. or launch parties at Gordon Ramsay is very much the equivalent of People magazine or US Weekly to me. What’s next – a Mario Batali sex tape? Make. It. Stop.

Lack of Trust in Food Journalism

There’s always John Mariani and The Danny Meyer Blue Smoke revelation. Add to that my continued belief that reviewers and writers have relationships with chefs and restaurateurs that cloud their reviews, judgment and in many cases are the inspirations for the pieces they write. There’s also the line that I can’t seem to understand between PR and journalism. I’m pretty skeptical about much of what I read in 2006, both online and in print and unfortunately, I don’t see this changing. What the NYC restaurant consumer needs is an advocate and trusted voice for the consumer – someone who will remove themselves from the PR and special agenda buzz machines and give it to the people like it is - sans bullshit.

Truffle Scams

I would say that of the 7 out of 10 times I spring for the fresh truffles on a menu, they are a let down. Not fresh, not vibrant, not worth the price. Restaurants that invest in the whole fresh truffle intend to sell every last shaving, even when they are not at their prime or are well past. They wouldn’t do this with any other ingredient, so why would they with the most expensive they offer? At Cru recently, after asking how fresh the white truffles were, the server actually brought a huge truffle out for us to smell. It wasn’t as pungent or special as expected but no doubt it would be shaved for the next month for $100 a plate.

The Downslide of Gramercy Tavern

I personally think Gramercy and 11 Madison have switched positions in the NYC restaurant chain. Even though Tom Colicchio and team were doing homey, comfort cooking, it was done with creativity and perfection. I think what is being dished out at Gramercy right now is good but not great – this is based on two experiences I’ve had there in 2006. Gramercy should be knocking the socks off of people. Currently, I believe this special restaurant is just coasting. I think GT needs a major shake up in the kitchen and hope 2007 brings much needed inspiration.